I am a girl who could never accept failure in any circumstances and always have a keen insight into whatever work I took up. Being born to a middle class family bore many hardships during my entire childhood. I'm remembered in my family as the 'silent girl'. The way I was brought up actually enabled me to handle everyday problems and I was able to step into my adulthood with the ability to handle them with a striking ease.

I am now doing my third year in college and am in a Paramedical Course with a BS in Ophthalmic Assistant. I can never forget those lonely days of my schooling because I was far apart from everything. I was neglected by all my friends because of a scar on my left hand which looked very bad. It cost much to my life and now it is worse since I now have linear scleroderma in my right hand.

Being in the medical field and having such a disease is a bad impression for me. I hide my hands from everyone and because of this behavior of mine, people assume that I am shy. I have managed three years of college somehow, but I am worried now since my studies is to be related with assisting in theatres.

Applying disinfectants do harm my hand and it itches a lot, but I have dealt with this pain for a year. I often wonder how will I manage my final year of college which begins July 1, 2009, with all the pain and itching or while assisting in operation theatre.

My parents are looking for the successful completion of my course and finding a good job, but they do not care how much stress it will be for me. How can I disappoint them? I am bearing so much pain and no one else knows or understands.

And now I have decided to speak to my superiors at college to excuse me from attending theatre. I would do well in the out-patient arena. Will they accept this? Will they respond to this need of mine? I don't know. One more day before college reopens and I am very troubled but believe they will hear my request.